Chapter 2:
Chapter 2: the New Adventures of Spongebob
(Opening scene(with techno music played background): In the underwater High tech complex of Military base and labs, a futuristic boat-truck arrives, carrying goods for the complex)
Armored Security Fishpeople : Identify Yourself!
Boat-truck Driver: I come here to carrying supplies for this complex
Armored Security Fishpeople : Ok
(and that Boat-truck enters the complex where guards are about to open the truck)
Guard 1: Let's see what's inside the Truck *opens the Truck's load alongside other guards*
Guard 2: It's full
(unaware to everyone, Something drags both guard to inside the truck's load)
Guard 3: Everybody! let's check what inside the truck! *calls all the other guards to enter the Truck's load*
(then Spongebob appeared from the Truck, Fights Those Guards with his Karate and defeats them all single handedly with his Skill and Agility)
Spongebob: *uses his communicator watch* This is Spongebob
No. No you aren't. You are some weird cyberpunk martial artist OC who has stolen and taken his name and skin. Our protagonist everybody! No doubt a supernatural creature who goes around killing stupid sea sponges, flaying them and hollowing them out, then wearing this persona over them like a skin-changer while claiming to be them. Thankfully this threat is not that much of one, because if a shapechanging martial artist was actually smart, they'd pick more intelligent targets to impersonate. Honestly however I do not mourn Spongebob's death, he had it coming for quite some time, but unfortunately this OC is likely not that much smarter of a replacement.
Communicator voice: you should go and Retrieve the Cheese before they use it on their experiments: turning it into Naquadah
Spongebob: ok
(Spongebob encounters 2 more guards, but this time they are armed with Machine gun and luckily, they are still no Match for Spongebob as Spongebob's Spongy structure cushions and deflects every single bullets that they fired upon Spongebob so Spongebob can defeats those Guards with ease, then Spongebob encounters pair of Gun Turrets(Back and Front) where both fires rocket on Spongebob only to hits and destroys each other by accident as Spongebob ducks for life, then he finally reaches the main lab's blast door)
Spongebob: *Hacks the Computer that controls Blast Door*
(and the blast door to the lab are opens for Spongebob where he sucessfully acquires the Cheese that he is looking for, but doing so triggers alarm, so he is Surrounded by Guards as well drones, but as they fires their guns on Spongebob, they are still no Match for Spongebob as Spongebob is Bulletproof(and have Accelerated Healing) He can easily makes short work of his enemies by his Karate after his enemies are run out of Ammo so they are simply can do nothing but retreat when Spongebob fights them, then Spongebob makes his way out of the Complex until he reaches hangar where he sees an empty vehicles only to confronts his enemies once more, this time they rides Powered armor, but they are also have no match for Spongebob as spongebob shoots them all with Sponge Cannon(he transforms into sponge cannon) that fires high explosive bubble, and Spongebob Hotwires one of the Empty vehicles with ease and leaves the Complex with cheese)
Our fight scene everybody. First: the hell is a Naquadah? Also I count three uses of the words "no match", and second this fight scene is boring as a brick, and third our shapeshifting martial artist infiltrator is apparently a Super-Skrull who can regenerate. Also, why the hell is a cheese important? its just cheese. Also, don't guns not work underwater? Pretty sure they don't. This is just the author going "yeah, my OC who stole Spongebob's name is invincible, everyone look how invincible he is."
(cuts to the Krusty Krab)
Narrator: meanwhile in the Krusty Krab
(Spongebob enters Krusty Krab and reaches the table where the customer that scared because his Krabby Patty have no cheese)
Spongebob: don't worry guy, I have Cheese for your Krabby Patty
(then Countdown begins as Spongebob places Cheese on Krabby Patty very carefully and Finally he did it)
Everyone but Spongebob: *Cheers* you did it Spongebob
Spongebob: thanks everyone
Everyone but Spongebob: *lifts Spongebob then ir cheers degenerates into alarm clock sound*
(it revealed that is nothing more than Spongebob's dream as Spongebob wakes up because of the Alarm that sounds exactly like crowds does in the very last scene in his dream)
So this was all pointless in the end, just like the rest of this script, which is really just a fan-fic that the author doesn't realize is one, because he actually thinks this has a chance of being made into a film. I'm not making this up.
Spongebob: good morning everyone!
(Spongebob then go to Bathroom where he ates 1 dozen of soap then he plugs water hose to himself, Bloating him temporarily then releases foam everywhere as he shrinks, then He goes to Wardrobe where he grabs and wears his signature pants that this time has Krusty Krab 2 manager badge, and he leaves his Pineapple house only to stumbles at the newspaper at the front of his house)
Spongebob: let's see what in the today's newspaper?
Spongebob: huh!
Bikini Times
Breaking News: Plankton escaped from Asylum for criminally tiny by unknown means
Polices are Mystified by this incident and the only good news so far is: Plankton is presumed missing
one dozen WHATS of soap? bars? slips? cars? elephants? Also, your just repeating normal spongebob, so this is basically a waste of a supposedly crossover fiction.
Spongebob: fuh! I must tell Patrick
(Spongebob runs to the Patrick's house)
Spongebob: Good Morning Patrick
(Patrick's rock house opens)
Patrick: hey Spongebob
Spongebob: I have terrible news
Patrick: What!
Spongebob: Plankton has escaped from Asylum for Criminally tiny after we defeats him years ago
Patrick: I have a Bad News too: Bikini Bottom have a new President named Jonathan W Bush
Spongebob: What's a big deal?
Patrick: *confused*
Spongebob: Ok I will go to Krusty Krab 2 Right Now
Wow, sudden turn into the political. Guess who that president is. Its ridiculously easy to guess, I mean, he only changed the first part of the name. Its George W Bush, yes we get it, he was a horrible president, who cares. Its 2016, he is so last decade by now, hes old news. Now Trump, he is the hot new horrible presidential candidate who wants to bang his daughter, and while he doesn't have much else going for him, I will say he does make ol Georgey look like a loser in a "Be A Horrible President" contest.
(Spongebob walks to the Krusty Krab 2(encounters advertisement signs like: "tired of energy crisis and climate change, try cold fusion", "Today is Tommorow", "XDTV: beyond HD", "Monoatomic Gold plus Carbon Nanotube: makes silicon chip thing of the past", and "Quantum Digital fabrcator: works by utilizing Quantum Physics and String Theory" until he finally reaches Krusty Krab 2 and he enters Krusty Krab 2 and Works as Manager)
Spongebob: I'm ready! Krusty Krab 2
(Spongebob then goes to the Krusty Krab 2 manager's desk and sits behind it)
Narrator: everything is looks normal until telephone in Spongebob's desk rings (then he Receives call from telephone in his desk)
Spongebob: hello
Sandy: Spongebob! there's something terrible
Spongebob: what!
Sandy: the frequency of the Sightings like Ghost sightings, UFO sightings, and Cryptid sightings as well other Paranormal and supernatural phenomena are increased by at least 1000% in the last few weeks
Spongebob: ARE YOU HAVE READ TOO MUCH COMIC BOOKS, FANTASY BOOKS, AND SCIENCE FICTION BOOKS?
Sandy: No, I sincerely no
Spongebob: then what's more?
Sandy: I has makes my own Radar and it's shows strange blips that indicates somethings that stalks far outside Bikini Bottom
Spongebob: I think that things that shown in your radar as blips is behind increased frequency of Paranormal and Supernatural phenomena like that?
Sandy: Maybe
Spongebob: Bye-bye *closes telephone*
So as Spongebob passes evidence that he never left the dream, and is therefore probably still a ninja-Skrull, and ok 1: there is no such thing as "1000%", Spongebob suddenly freaks out for one second while listing everything imaginative, then suddenly becomes calm again as if that didn't, and Sandy is just like "maybe" to the last question as if he she doesn't know. I want you, whoever is reading this, to imagine how how someone would voice act all this, just imagine them trying to get this accurate in a way that makes sense for them speak, and for the life of me,I can't imagine anyone speaking this way. Mason is just writing words on the page without thinking about how they would be spoken out loud, because this all supposed to be animated according to his grand vision, so somebody would have to say the line "ARE YOU HAVE READ TOO MUCH COMIC BOOKS, FANTASY BOOKS AND SCIENCE FICTION BOOKS?" once then immediately go back to "then whats more?" as if they didn't just suddenly scream at the top of their voice in broken english, this needs an editor badly, except I can't imagine any editor in their right mind going to the trouble for something like this, because the fact that this is all spelled incorrectly or have characters suddenly doing that for no reason is only one problem of many, so its not really worth any editors time, because they would throw this in the trash from reading the first page.
Narrator: Spongebob continues his works on Krusty Krab 2 as manager until he heard the news that a Jet liner hits sea Needle
Spongebob: Let's see what's happened to the Sea Needle *goes from Krusty Krab 2 to Sea Needle*
(as Spongebob arrives, Spongebob finds out that Planes that crashes to Sea Needle are simply bursts into Flame, then the sea Needle itself collapse just like WTC twin towers did it during September 11 2001 attacks)
Narrator: and Spongebob finds himself being number one fugitive by bikini bottom as well his friends *Crysis soundtrack: First Light plays in the background*
(then Spongebob is confronted by Bikini Bottom lawman where He makes short work of them, then he saves Squidward and Mr. Krabs from those lawman and Spongebob, Squidward, and Mr. Krabs escapes with Squidward's boat with Spongebob as driver, they drive to Patrick's house)
Then we get the author's weird obsession wth 9/11. Yes we get it, American soil was attacked and this is scary when this hasn't happened in oh......wait.....since Pearl Harbor? Hawaii got attacked by Japan? only um.... about 60 years ago when 9/11 happened? really, this is not an unprecedented thing. the Civil war was also a war on American soil, so America is not some mythical land that suddenly got attacked after thousands of years of peace. and then suddenly, Ninja-Skrull-Bob is randomly just suddenly being the guy everyone thinks is the one who did it just because, and then Ninja-Skrull-Bob kills a cop then makes his escape, now that everyone has found out about his mission to convert Earth to the Skrull empire. But really, this bunch of directions is so sparse that it reads like a random montage out of nowhere, like its just a bunch of photos just randomly pasted between scenes, yet its supposed to be this dramatic turn of events or something. problem is, read like this, it has no impact and its just a random series of events that transitions to the next real scene.
Spongebob: Here I come! Patrick
(Spongebob, Squidward, and Mr. Krabs Reaches Patrick's House)
Spongebob: I come to Save you
(The Rock where Patrick lives underneath it are opens and Patrick emerges from it)
Spongebob: Come on Patrick!
Patrick: What!
Spongebob: You are fugitive of law too!
Patrick: oh no
Squidward: me too
Mr. Krabs: but why those policemen are go after us just because of the destruction of Sea Needle?
Spongebob: I don't know, let's just drive to Sandy's Treedome
And Patrick and Squidward are basically just mindless drones with no emotions right now, Ninjaskrullbob OCpants is similarly too calm to be the actual character, really this is just lazy.
(they drives to Sandy's Treedome until they have finally reaches it only to finds that Sandy is surrounded by Bikini Bottom lawman, but luckily she is more than capable of take care of herself and she makes short work of those Lawman by her karate)
Spongebob and Patrick: Sandy! are yo allright?
Sandy: I'm allright
Spongebob: can you hack to Bikini Bottom government network?
Sandy: yes of course *turns on her wrist mounted PC and hacks Bikini Bottom network with her wrist mounted computer that uses hologram as it's monitor*
(it revealed that Spongebob Squarepants, Patrick Star, Sandy Cheeks, Squidward Tentacles, Eugene H Krabs, Pearl Krabs, Mrs. Puff, and Larry the Lobster are suspects of the attack on Sea Needle)
Because Sandy is suddenly a hacker now? oh and for no reason, they are suspected because........No reason! They just are. Complete breakdown of logic. No rhyme or reason, it just happens because.
Spongebob: oh! and why they are go after us?
Sandy: They finds out that the evidence behind the attack to Sea Needle are proves that the suspects are no other than us
Spongebob: why?
Sandy: just before the Plane hits Sea Needle, it seems to paradrops Spongebob Squarepants, Patrick Star, Sandy Cheeks, Squidward Tentacles, Eugene H Krabs, Pearl Krabs, Mrs. Puff, and Larry the Lobster to the downtown and they all just dissappears so Bikini Bottom polices are go after us as they thinks that people that jumps from Airplane with parachute are real person
Spongebob: is people that jumps from Airplane are our clones?
Sandy: maybe yes
Mr. Krabs: perhaps Plankton did this for repeats his failed plan Z that he has recently perfected it?
Squidward: maybe
Spongebob: Squidward! lets get your boat upgraded to escape from Bikini Bottom
Narrator: and then Spongebob and Sandy upgrades Squidward's boat with various High-Tech gadgets and weaponry amongst many other things like expanding passenger capacity for accomodates more physically bigger people, but unfortunately they rushed the upgrade as they finds out that they have no more time to escape Bikini Bottom(Spongebob and Sandy upgrades Squidward's boat)
Clones? So.....they're just assuming they'e clones. That whatever villain is behind this, created clones, which probably take time to grow and develop, specifically of them over long years, as well taking the time to train them and teach them and basically brainwash them....all for this one moment of framing. That is so inefficient, stupid and illogical that everyday supervillains are facepalming at it, knowing that even they could do better. oh and pointless upgrades, because cybersuck
Spongebob: Let's go and pack up Everybody! *runs upgraded Squidward's boat* and first, Mr. Krabs, we need to save your daughter, Pearland more evidence that NinjaSkrullBob has replaced Spongebob: Spongebob can't drive for shit. and they just go into the vast wilderness aimlessly just like this entire script! oh and Plankton gets the formula to somehow take over the world.....yes.....somehow control the world......through a burger.....at the bottom of the ocean......in a small town nobody knows about.....His plan is literally:
(Spongebob and his company reaches Mr. Krabs' house where they seen Pearl Krabs about to be arrested)
Pearl: Help!
Spongebob: I can save you! *presses a button in the steering wheel to releases smoke grenade*
(then all the police get's their sights obscured by smoke bomb where Spongebob secretly rescues Pearl)
Spongebob: then we save Mrs. Puff
(Spongebob and company car Arrives at Mrs. Puff house)
Mrs. Puff: I'm so glad you are good driver Spongebob
(then Spongebob orders Mrs. Puff to enters his car and Mrs. Puff did so)
Spongebob: and finally Larry the Lobster
(Spongebob and his friends are finally arrives at Goo Lagoon where they saves Larry the Lobster from Bikini Bottom police)
Spongebob: next stop, vast wilderness beyond Bikini Bottom *press a button that triggers nitro for boosting boat's speed*
Narrator: Meanwhile(cut to Krusty Krab)
(Plankton enters Krusty Krab)
Plankton: hehehehehehehe now finally I can steals Krabby Patty formula once more *enters secret vault in Krusty Krab and steals Krabby Patty formula*
Plankton: and I will rule the world once and for all by mixing my newfound powers and this formula DOOOMWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
(Plankton leaves Krusty Krab with Krabby Patty Formula)
1. Acquire Krabby Patty Formula
2. ???
3. World Domination
So, I think this part should end in the most appropriate manner possible: A song.
Are you ready kids?
Aye aye captain!
I can't hear yoooooouuuuu!
AYE AYE CAPTAIN!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHH.......
WHO LIVES IN PARANOID CONSPIRACY FANTASY LAND?
MAS-ON-I-CON!
If With Bad Writing you want to dirty your hand....
MAS-ON-I-CON!
If incoherent illogical nonsense is something you wish....
MAS-ON-I-CON!
Then kill your brain and hit your head with a dish!
MAS-ON-I-CON!
If a messy aimless plot is something you want....
MAS-ON-I-CON!
Then this stupid crossover fic your dreams it will haunt!
MAS-ON-I-CON!
If you desire a non-story where nothing will fit...
MAS-ON-I-CON!
Then just come here and read this illogical shit!
MAS-ON-I-CON, MAS-ON-I-CON, MAS-ON-I-CON,MAS-ON-I-CON
MAS-OOOOOOOOON...
I-COOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!!!!
ahar, yahahahahhahahahar........
*toot-toot-toot-te-toot!*